Seasons

It’s been many years now since I entered the season of sensible shoes. I’m now a year shy of eight decades and have entered the season of fugitive information. You know the kind, that word or phrase that plays hide-and-seek in the back of your mind, and the harder you seek, the harder it hides, dashing in and out amongst the forest of memories. Until. Three days later, out of the blue, the lost tidbit pops up, out of context, just because it can.

The human brain is an astounding organ. We are, after all, created in the image of the invisible God of all Creation. Thankfully, He never forgets anything! Well, that isn’t entirely true, for He promises to forget out sins, once confessed and repented of. Indeed, as far as the East is from the West, He says. Our sins don’t play hide-and-seek in the back of His mind, just waiting to pop up and accuse us again. No, that is the work of the Devil, the Accuser of the Brethren, who are God’s Beloved people.

Often, out of false guilt, we do it to ourselves. Even once genuine guilt has been brought before the Lord, and forgiven by Him, we can’t seem to let go of the shame, the memory, ourselves. This is information we wish were fugitive. It can be. Sometimes we need to forgive ourselves. The Lord shared with me, many years ago, that not forgiving myself was akin to thinking I had higher standards of human conduct than He does! Oops. After all, if He has forgiven me, who am I to hold to higher standards than His by not doing so as well? Isn’t that the epitome of pride? I am more righteous (translate that SELF-righteous) than He? Oops again. Pride, that sneaky devil, no pun intended, seems to show up even in the most well intentioned positions we hold.

While it may seem the height of hubris that we could forgive ourselves–after all, that is the province of the Holy One–it can perhaps be seen in the same light as forgiving another person who has injured us. Certainly our sin injures not only others, but ourselves as well. Sometimes the injury is direct, sometimes indirect, but sin always injures. At the very least hanging on to shame and guilt inhibits future effectiveness. It is a hindrance. A hindrance to holy living. To feeling worthy to ever be used of God for any good purpose.

This is the day, the day to put aside all things that interfere with our walking closely with the Lord. Each day is a new start, His mercies are new every morning.